Oil on canvas

This self-protrait reflects my desire to comfort my inner child by embracing a cherished childhood toy, a piece of self-soothing and healing. In the painting, I embody the role of both mother and nurturer, represented by the plantain tree, whose freshly cut fruit symbolizes longing and loss. I yearn to love myself fully, to return to my roots, to Puerto Rico, a place where my childhood home, once sheltered under a roof of rusted corrugated zinc, now exists only in memory and fantasy. It frames my dream of finding the love, safety, and shelter I crave.
In Puerto Rican schools, when children fail to state their full name, which includes the last name that links to their mother, teachers gently remind them with the saying, “Tú no naciste de una mata de plátano” (You weren’t born of a plantain tree) But here, I reclaim that sentiment: yes, I was born of the tree. I am from here. My mother is the tree. I am the tree.